DEA just banned Kratom because of white sexual inadequacy

The Drug Enforcement Agency has long ignored science, logic and practicality, choosing instead to seek control over a growing number of harmless substances -- substances important to races and cultures the DEA is targeting. This time, it’s the relatively obscure herb kratom, used by some cultures to fight anxiety and increase sexual performance.

The DEA has just filed a notice to classify it as schedule 1, making it illegal. Schedule 1 is reserved for narcotics with no medicinal use and a high potential for abuse which include heroine, meth and sadly, marijuana.

What’s insane about the classification is that kratom is extremely safe, difficult to overdose on, and has been used in Thai medicine for hundreds of years. The plant produces a mild buzz when ingested, similar to opiates. Traditionally it has been used as a treatment for opiate withdrawal and addiction in southeast Asia.

And kratom has tested medicinal benefits -- not that the DEA cares about science. They recently decided to maintain marijuana’s schedulization, ignoring reams of research proving the medicinal benefits of marijuana.

Scientific papers have been published showing kratom can be used as a natural sex pill. It can increase physical endurance and sexual performance, and heighten sexual desire.

If you asked yourself, "why has the DEA come out of nowhere to harsh the buzz of the few peaceful kratom fans in the country?" well, there's your answer. The fragile white men in the DEA weren’t invited to parties by the cool kids in high school and have white anxiety about lacking sexual performance.

You thought the stereotype of DEA agents as morbidly obese middle aged white wife beaters was over the top? It's not.

Sure, the sex performance aspect of kratom is not its loftiest use, but there’s already many legal medicines on the market that fulfill these purposes (with more side effects). The real issue is that kratom is so not a big deal, mom. You have to take a LOT to get a very mild high, and barely anyone’s even heard of it.

There’s a Whitehouse.gov petition with 20,000 signatures calling on the president to stop the DEA from going through with their plan. But even if it gets the 100,000 signatures, it is unlikely that it would do anything in a white supremacist system built up around toxic and often criminal institutions like the FBI and DEA. If the former member of the Choom Gang couldn’t get the DEA to reclassify marijuana, the lesser known and lobbied for kratom won’t fare much better.

UPDATE: Thanks in part to us calling out the DEA, the DEA has announced it's reversing the decision to classify Kratom as a Schedule 1 drug. Kratom is "listed as a Drug and Chemical of Concern" but legal.

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  1. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    it's weird to think we haven't really stopped to ask what's motivating DEA scheduling decisions before now. We just assume that if something has been declared an illegal drug, it's bad. But you don't see homeless people hitting you up for money on the street because they need kratom. Never gonna happen. It's not a drug, in that sense.

    It was, in fact, banned because a group of obese and small penised white males inside the DEA feared the sexual potency Thais and other nonwhite groups were getting from it. Fricking crazy.

  2. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    I'm addicted to it and do around a dozen teaspoons a day. I've technically been high on it for over 2 years without ever stopping. My brain is totally fricked. No it shouldn't be banned. Banning a plant is fricking moronic but people need to know that it is a very addictive substance to certain people. In my experience it is harder to quit than alcohol, weed and cigs combined.

  3. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Kratom is a great way to quit alcohol, ease anxiety and depression and apparently boosts your immune system. It should absolutely not be banned. That being said, if you use it frequently, you will go through horrible opiod withdrawals and deep depression when you stop. Physical withdrawals last up to a few weeks. Mental withdrawals can last a few months. You cannot OD on it like with legitimate opiods; you'll just vomit.
    As for the hairloss, this happened to me everytime I used it for prolonged periods of time. Even at a small 3 gram dosage for sleep, you will lose your hair. That, and it will effect your muscle growth if you work out. I'm not sure the estrogenic properties of it, or how it interacts with your endocrine system, but it absolutely does something. The best use I can see for this is if you're elderly, already bald and in pain. This stuff is far safer than pharmaceutical opiods.
    Another interesting side effect I noticed was that it makes you want to study and work. Even if you do the most mundane shit and hate your job, this stuff will make it fun. The best way I could describe it would be like oxycodone mixed with Adderall, but you still can fall asleep if you choose to. Kratom is very fascinating, but there absolutely are risks to it. The hairloss/muscle loss was my breaking point. Good news though, your hair will grow back when you quit (as long as you're not balding naturally). Hope this helps for anyone interested in trying this stuff.

    • 2 years ago
      bing

      Thanks wise man. Have you gotten any dark eye circles or dry skin as well? I hate how kratom a seemingly innocent drug can REALLY frick up your appearance. I'd use it for the rest of my life if it had bo shitty side effects.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        When I left the military, they stopped filling my Ambien. I found Kratom and was on it for a year and a half. I quit drinking the first night I took it and could actually sleep when I wanted to sleep. My skin became bad and I had dark circles under my eyes. The worst part was the dandruff and acne-like sores that appeared on my scalp. Like a moron, I never put two and two together to figure out that it was the kratom until I went to the barber and was told that if they cut my hair shorter, my bald spots will show. I did my research, and sure enough, it was a very common symptom in people that use Kratom. I went cold turkey and went through horrible withdrawals. Physical withdrawals kept me from sleeping for days. The mental withdrawal had me extremely depressed, but I knew they would eventually go away. At that time I was taking probably between 30-40gpd...again, I was an idiot with it.
        A year later, I thought of using it as a sleep aid only, taking six .5 gram capsules a night. I still lost my hair, but the withdrawals were almost entirely absent (slight restlessness in my limbs only). After being off it again, the hairloss stopped, skin became better and all negative side effects went away, with the exception of occasional cravings when I'm really irritated.

  4. 2 years ago
    Proud

    Excellent. I'm white and I support this ban. Feel our power. Bring on June where we ban you killing from pre-born babies in every red state. Your pathetic insults about my high achieving race, a race that all non-whites envy mean nothing we just laugh at them. You may impotently sneer and call us white men and "fragile" all you like, you need white men invented computers and white men invented internet technology to even squeak you impotent yapping . What is not "fragile" is our Supreme Court majority and our robust Senate filibuster. In November we retake congress completely. By limiting your access to Kratom we are just protecting you foolish people from yourselves. Think of it not as a Kratom ban but as sensible Kratom control. Thank you for the entertainment and be sure to follow our Kratom laws or we will tase you.

  5. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    I have a weird relationship with it, generally take it a couple times a week but then i wont touch the stuff for months at a time. Not even a T break or anything, i just end up forgetting that i have itf and i dont know if ive ever gone through any kind of WD, if i have it was very mild and not really noticeable. I dont measure so im not sure how much i take, id estimate its somewhere between 2g or so. i just have a cap that i fill to a certain point and throw it back. Ive never been addicted to opiates or really even tried them outside of oxy one time so maybe thats why i dont like red all that much or maybe i just dont take enough of it. White vein is good for a mood booster and is pretty nice for getting through shitty days of work.
    havent noticed looking worse because of taking it, but I dont take it a whole lot in the first place. I hope it doesnt become illegal. I've seen first hand how much it can help someone whos actually addicted to opiates.

  6. 2 years ago
    mongo

    used it like twice a week for about a year during college and it helped quite a bit with motivation, makes you feel like getting shit done. Strange drug that makes your body relaxed while your mind alert, perfect for when working a shitty job. Honestly pretty good for socializing with too if your extremely autistic. haven't used it for a couple years, wasn't that exciting but I kinda want to try it again,
    Downsides are it can get really addicting really fast, and tolerance builds just as fast. I specifically kept it to only twice a week with 2 different strains because of this tolerance problem. If you're using it daily or multiple times a day prepare to be taking 5g+ doses and nearly vomiting.
    You can't really overdose on it because you will be puking your brains out before you can get there, I believe all recorded deaths included other substances in their systems. don't mix with alcohol and other downers, caffeine and weed is fine.

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