The ability to share your enjoyment of a concert by jumping into a receptive crowd is an incredible feeling. Except for when the crowd isn’t so receptive, and you plummet to the ground instead.
But watching a person hurling himself into a packed crowd that somehow conspires to move neatly out of the way, leaving the stage diver with a one-way ticket to Faceplantville is undoubtedly hilarious.
That’s why we’ve compiled a video tour-de-force of the eight ultimate stage dive fails and, for their sake, we’ve charitably pointed out where they went wrong.
Fatal error: What the hell, dude? Maybe the reason no-one wanted to catch you is because you went in knees first. Also, you’re at a Green Day show. No one has stage dived at a Green Day gig since 1993.
Fatal error: A member of the band Tequila Baby invited a fan to do a Mosh. He jumped on his back and his pants came off, showing off his butt. Now everyone has seen his butt.
Make sure you’ve got a crowd — Duh
Fatal error: Make sure you’ve got a crowd to dive into.
Fatal error: This is an odd one. We don’t really know what Method Man does wrong here. You might expect Justin Bieber fans to move out of the way at the site of a 14 stone six-footer flying into the audience but not Wu Tang Clan fans — but they do.
He took a big risk, let’s see how it turns out for him
Fatal error: Don’t just come darting out of nowhere and jump into what, at best, could be called a sparse crowd. Fool!
Fatal error: Believe it or not, this is a clip from Finland’s biggest music festival.* This budding stage diver attempts a feet first dive and actually appears to execute it perfectly, until the whole “catching” part — which in fairness is kind of out of his hands.
*This is not true.
Never to trust a man in dungarees
Fatal error: If there is one thing we’ve learned from horror films, it is never to trust a man in dungarees. This video is funny anyway, before the whole failed stage dive toward the end. This was filmed in 2010. That’s this year. Unreal.
Fatal error: She jumped right in there in a skimpy outfit without making sure the audience isn’t a bunch of horny Chinese boys. You think China’s gonna charge the Little Emperors?