Basically, there are two types of long-distance relationships. The first one comprises relationships that were forced to become remote. For example, one of the partners got a better job in another city or had to move temporarily to another country for studies.
To the second type belong purely long-distance relationships where partners met and started building their relationship online. Although the technology has made it possible to stay connected to our loved ones no matter how far they are from us, still there comes the moment when couples ask themselves whether their relationship has the future.
The main difference between a regular relationship and a long-distance one is that the latter is devoid of physical presence. Verbal communication is not enough for love to thrive. Living miles away from each other you’ll be able to test the viability of your relationship. They say if your love didn’t stand that test, it wasn’t the real love.
Issues that emerge from living apart
Living together brings a lot of benefits: you can rely on each other, get support through thick and thin, and make decisions together.
Living apart resembles life after a breakup or divorce – in both cases, you have to learn how to live alone: cook only for yourself, go to bed alone, meet up with friends as a single.
While living apart you gradually forget what it is to live under the same roof and start idealizing your partner and your relationship. As a result, when you finally get together, you may feel a bit disillusioned.
Very often long-distance relationships don’t stand the test of living apart and the man is usually the party at fault — due to their different psychology and physiology.
For example, if a woman has a real boyfriend and an online boyfriend, it’s difficult to say who she will choose. A man however will likely choose the IRL girlfriend simply because she is closer. His online girlfriend will be his dream, good friend, or just an ideal.
Nevertheless, women can also initiate a breakup after a long period of living away from their partners. It happens when a woman meets another guy and gets an opportunity to compare him with her long-distance lover.
Jealousy is another common issue. When two people don’t see each other for a long time, they might become jealous, especially if the level of trust between them is not very high or the other partner triggers doubts.
Also, a lack of non-verbal communication can cause some misunderstandings. This is because some people can’t clearly verbalize their feelings. They need to see and even touch their partner for better understanding.
Looking on the bright side
A long-distance relationship isn’t easy but still it can have a happy ending. Chances for success increase if the time spent apart is clearly defined and you can visit each other occasionally — this will keep your passion alive. Every long-awaited meeting turns into a short honeymoon and every date feels like the first. Sex as well. This is one of the benefits of being in a long-distance relationship.
Your pseudo-loneliness also has its advantages. You can dedicate your free evenings and weekends to self-improvement or a new hobby that you have always wanted to start but didn’t have time for it. Be sure, your partner will appreciate it. It’s a pleasure to watch how your partner grows as a personality and changes for the better.
When you live together, you don’t notice some changes because they happen gradually. But when your encounters are few and far between, you can see the progress.
Moreover, certain things can be noticed only from a distance – you can’t even imagine how much new you can learn about your partner. For example, you thought your partner can’t be romantic and suddenly you receive long touching love letters. You thought he lacks perseverance but when he wanted to come to you for the weekend, he managed to eliminate all the obstacles and here he is standing on your threshold. Yes, long distance can ruin your relationship but it can also help you realize how much you love each other.
Archimedes once said that love is a theorem that needs to be proved every day and this adage totally applies to the long-distance relationships. Even if you met offline but you want to build a happy relationship with this person offline, you should get together in real life soon. Plan your real date and start counting days to it. While waiting for your meeting, communicate regularly, show interest in each other’s lives, trust each other, and talk about your future.