Why is there no Humor in The Bible?

Why is there no Humor in The Bible? You'd think a 2000 year old epic story written by multiple people would have at least some funny anecdotes, surely ONE of the 12 apostles had a sense of humor.

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  1. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >why come this math textbook don't got no jokes?

  2. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Those kids make fun of that one prophet by saying 'Go up, you Bald Head' which I'm pretty sure is supposed to be a dick joke.

  3. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Humour is absent from many ancient works. The obsession with being funny is recent.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Not true. Pic related is a joke from 4k years ago.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >A dog walks into a bar and says, 'I cannot see a thing. I’ll open this one.’

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Greek works are full of humor, there's even some light humor in a lot of stories in Buddhism and ancient Chinese stories.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        There is a lot of humor in ancient Chinese works. No clue about Buddhist, never read much of that.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Humour is absent from many ancient works. The obsession with being funny is recent.
      Do tradlarpers just make shit up in their heads about the past and then act like it's true

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Yeah, they are pretty much frog posters.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        That’s what tradlarping is

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      There is humour

      Read plato

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I love reading Plato for this exact reason. The guy was a true mad lad

        do you think jesus ever laughed at a dick joke? i mean he was a teenager once right? did he ever jerked off? was he ever caught by his mother?

        Matthew 3:9 is essentially John the Baptist holding his nut sack whilst taunting the pharisees.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      > obsession with being funny is recent
      You absolute shitstain, there’s comedy just after writing turns from accounting to prose. Now you will claim that is “recent” to save your moronation by pretending you were joking.

  4. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >he never read Leviticus

  5. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Two of Jesus' apostles indignantly wanting Jesus to rain down thunder on their enemies, and then Jesus calling them "the sons of thunder" from that point on is kinda funny.

  6. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Jesus never laughed!

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      do you think jesus ever laughed at a dick joke? i mean he was a teenager once right? did he ever jerked off? was he ever caught by his mother?

  7. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    There is humour in the Gospels
    Jesus roasts people, is sometimes sarcastic and ironic. But the authors sometimes make little jokes

    Look at Mark 8:just after jesus multiplies the bread he asks the disciples to beware of yeast of the pharisees and roast the dumbasses:

    13 And He left them, and getting into the boat again, departed to the other side. 14 Now [a]the disciples had forgotten to take bread, and they did not have more than one loaf with them in the boat. 15 Then He charged them, saying, “Take heed, beware of the [b]leaven of the Pharisees and the leaven of Herod.”

    16 And they reasoned among themselves, saying, “It is because we have no bread.”

    17 But Jesus, being aware of it, said to them, “Why do you reason because you have no bread? Do you not yet perceive nor understand? Is your heart [c]still hardened? 18 Having eyes, do you not see? And having ears, do you not hear? And do you not remember? YOU DUMBASSES

  8. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >israelites have been enslaving gentiles for thousands of years
    >and you're laughing

  9. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Religion Professor and Presbyterian minister Conrad Hyers finds humor in Elijah's ridicule of "the priests of Baal who wailed and slashed themselves in the hope that Baal would send fire from Heaven. "Shout louder!...Perhaps he is deep in thought, or busy, or traveling; or perhaps he is asleep and must be awakened!" (1 Kings 18:27)[12]:7

    Brutal mockery

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      It's even funnier because what's translated "busy" there literally means "doing his business" which might be a euphemism for going to the toilet. The ESV translates it like this:

      >And at noon Elijah mocked them, saying, “Cry aloud, for he is a god. Either he is musing, or he is relieving himself, or he is on a journey, or perhaps he is asleep and must be awakened.”

  10. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    there was that one talking donkey, how then went on to meet an ogre and marry a dragon

  11. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The part were they tricked a rival clan into circumcising themselves and then while they were recovering killed them all was pretty funny
    Jacob's trickery got a chuckle out of me
    And then there is nothing funnier than revelations which reeks of seethe: all u evil roman emperors are gonna get what's coming to you in the le 2nd coming

  12. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It's a religious and historical text.

  13. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

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