Does Trump have a time machine?

Nikola Tesla died on January 7, 1943 and the world mourned the passing of a great mind. Especially Serbia -- Tesla's homeland -- which at the time was a loose confederation of potato farming communes not generally known for thinking much about anything.

Two days later, FBI NYC notified Hoover of Tesla’s death and shared a report that his safe has been raided by family and colleagues. The Office of the Alien Property Custodian -- an agency now known for seizing half a billion dollars worth of private property during WWII -- became involved and decided to make off with his entire estate. Two truck loads of Tesla stuff checked into a Manhattan warehouse where the inventor had already deposited 30 barrels of other Tesla stuff and it was all placed under lock and seal.

Did this stuff include new technologies? Did his vast quantity of notes contain anything of value to US military or industry? (If you are not familiar with Tesla's later theories, he explored fantastical ideas like free energy, anti-gravity, invisibility, and yes; time travel -- all topics of great interest to US military at the time.) The National Defense Research Committee, now in charge of the burglary salvage operation, brought in an MIT professor to make sense of it all and get the answers.

That MIT professor was John G. Trump -- Donald Trump's nuclear uncle.

John poured over the barrels, crates, boxes, bags, trunks and suitcases of stuff and finally came back with a conclusion: nothing of new significance. The story ends here with everyone going home disappointed.

But wait! John was lying. The MIT professor was smart enough to know that if the National Defense Research Committee got its hands on what he found, it could mean the end of the world.

Because what he had found was nothing less than blueprints for a time machine.

Although John deemed Tesla's time machine plausible, he realized it was not possible to create with the technology of his day. He kept the notes a closely guarded secret and may have considered destroying them to prevent an accidental apocalypse or ten. What we do know for certain is that at some point before his 1985 death, guardianship of the notes passed to John's beloved nephew. Donald J. Trump.

Around this same time, (Donald) Trump was known to use pseudonyms such as John Miller and John Barron in partial homage to his uncle. However, there was another pseudonym for which he was not so well known: John Titor.

That name is important because that was the identity he chose to travel with -- into the far future.

Trump had been able to turn Tesla's theoretical time machine into a working prototype.

And "John Titor" discovered that America (and the entire world) had become a nuclear dystopia caused by radical Islamic terror.

Trump began posting at length to several forums in 2000 and 2001 about the timeline he had witnessed. He spoke of events that would occur from the early 2000's through to 2012. He could not name specifics of the radical Islamic terror at the time, lest the timeline become unavoidable or even more catastrophic. His uncle's calls for caution did not go unheeded and he tried to analyze the near infinite temporal variables and possibilities before making his moves.

Trump nevertheless continued to travel time, amassed a fortune, and made subtle changes which helped him delay the future he saw for as long as he could.

But that future is now rapidly setting in. Trump knew that the only way he could have enough influence to prevent this future totally would be to become President of the United States.

If it has ever seemed to you that Trump has a bizarre ability to accurately predict and manipulate his political opponents to his advantage, you now know why. They are not predictions. They are largely foreordained sequences from a knowable timeline and his machinations within it.

Trump wants to be President, but not for very long -- only as long as it takes. He's always said he wouldn't want to be President if there is someone else who can do as good a job.

This is where Mike Pence comes in.

You see, Mike Pence is also a time traveler and aware of most of Trump's plot. If you've ever thought Pence looks a little strange or out of place, this is why. He's from a future where the Mongolians had a sequel and revisited their weird steppe genetics upon our gene pool.

Pence is from farther into the future than any other known traveler and possesses a superior time machine. To put it simply, there can be more than one Mike Pence on planet Earth at any given point in time and he has the power to generate a near infinite supply of himself in the same amount of time it takes us normal folks to make a cup of coffee.

Several battalions of Mike Pences were (/will be) sent back to the past by Pence "Prime" and Trump in order to infiltrate the lives of political enemies before they ever became political enemies to begin with. Most of these enemies you've never even heard of; they met their demise or fell into obscurity long before they could become a threat to Trump.

Pence's motive to help Trump are as follows: a) avoid a temporal conflict and b) become president himself, as promised by Trump. He could theoretically have used his powers to become president without Trump's help, but behind the time traveling demi-god is a lonely man in want of validation from any kind of father figure.

2016 update: Time travel, especially the rudimentary techniques currently in use by a certain group of people opposed to Trump/Pence is not without its side effects:

Their overuse of the technology, while certainly having a negative impact on the health of their agents, has time and time again (no pun intended) stymied a lot of Trump and Pence's plans.

Also, Tim Kaine (who is gay) is not involved in this plot, and was essentially neutralized as a political threat long ago by a Pence Prime time agent who happened to remain undetected and is still in service. Simply take a closer look at Kaine's wife, their story, etc... But I'm getting sidetracked.

Trump's first attempt at defeating Hillary Clinton happened in the late 1990s. Trump hatched a plan to shame and discredit Bill Clinton to the point that Hillary would not be able to successfully run for public office. While the plan succeeded to some degree, a temporal incursion by Future Hillary prevented any lasting damage. She then went on to successfully run for the US Senate (New York).

Soon after that, despite Trump's best efforts: 9/11. It was Trump's biggest mistake, and something he regrets every day (and every yesterday, and every tomorrow).

But yeah, Donald J. Trump has a time machine.