okay, tell me what's bad about PHP 7.4+. protip: you can't. and you can't mention flaws of older versions

okay, tell me what's bad about PHP 7.4+
protip: you can't

and you can't mention flaws of older versions

PS. you want hardcore difficulty: tell me flaws of PHP 8.2+

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  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    No flaws. Just combine this amazing language with Laravel or Symfony and you mog all the JS code monkeys

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    just use Rust, it's memory safe

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      PHP has GC. it's memory safe as well

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    No multiple constructors

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Haven't used it in about 10 years but I'm pretty sure you can just make a static function call it with :: syntax.

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    bros, why is he so smug?

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    why can't i mention flaws of old versions that remain in the new version

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Half the tired classic complaints still apply, I don't get this meme.
    I don't like that sequential and associative arrays use the same type. I don't like the inconsistencies and footguns in the standard library (in_array() needs strict: true, json_encode needs JSON_THROW_ON_ERROR, I still can't remember the parameter orders for array_map/array_filter). I don't like how underpowered the metaprogramming is compared to e.g. Python, it's either Java-style setters and getters or hard to follow YOLO-style __call and dynamic properties. I don't like that the gradual typing is primitive compared to other languages, I'm grateful for phpstan but I feel like I'm the only one in my team who actually understands it (unlike with TypeScript which is more polished all around) and variance becomes a mess. I don't like that I can't write multiple statements in fn closures and that I need to write out all the captures in function closures. I hate the behavior of yield from, what a shitshow.
    t. writes greenfield PHP 8.2 full time

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      kys

      why can't i mention flaws of old versions that remain in the new version

      kys

      bros, why is he so smug?

      basedo

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >footguns
      Is "footguns" a new buzzword? I don't recall seeing it 5 years ago, now I see it everywhere. Or was a just not nooooooticing?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Could be that the noun form is new but shooting yourself in the foot with a programming language has been a popular meem for 40 years or so
        https://www.stroustrup.com/quotes.html

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Look at him go! 🙂 faster than every other language on the web.

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    coperino

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I respect the elephant chuds, but it ain't for me.
    > $
    > Slower than python and ruby
    > Types are just hints

    Laravel looks cool thoughever

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >slower than python and ruby
      false
      >types are just hints
      just like on any other script lang

      Ugly syntax

      >C-like
      >ugly
      kys

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      > $
      Yes. Problem?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Dollar signs are whatever
      It's pretty fast, the language is less dynamic than those two and hence easier to optimize (but the execution model is different so that might affect things)
      Type hints are enforced at runtime (but can't be very complex, no generics). phpstan can do offline typechecking with more complicated types but it's worse than the solutions for Python (and probably Ruby too but I haven't used that), let alone TypeScript
      I hate Laravel, it makes code hard to understand and half the time it implicitly does the wrong thing

      >slower than python and ruby
      false
      >types are just hints
      just like on any other script lang
      [...]
      >C-like
      >ugly
      kys

      The ternary operator has the wrong associativity, the new operator has the wrong precedence, a couple of functions are secretly syntax, {} inside "" is hamstrung, fn and match can't contain statements, declare() is bizarre
      It's ugly in the details

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      > $
      you can go with define()
      > Slower than python and ruby
      False, PHP is objectively the fastest interpreted programming language, it beats ruby, python, node, lua, erlang and elixir, and it can get to C speed when you enable JIT + OPCache, so if you really know the language you can get amazing results.
      > Types are just hints
      Completely false, in PHP types are optional, but if you decide to assign a type to a variable, parameter or function return you must respect it or it will throw an error.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >Slower than python and ruby
      kek
      python/ruby is like 4 times slower than php, unless it's some cpython variation
      https://www.techempower.com/benchmarks/#hw=ph&test=fortune&section=data-r22
      >fastest python 69k
      >fastest ruby 56k
      >fastest php 290k

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        PYTODDLERS BTFO

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Ugly syntax

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >tell me flaws of PHP 8.2+
    an update quadrupled the memory usage of php in some use-cases, and it's artificially limited at 128mb of maximum ram usage by default in the configurations of already deployed systems so the product the company he works at sell is fricked until 8.4 """maybe""" fixes it

    what kind of fricking programming language has a "config-time" maximum ram usage limit? holy shit

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >he
      meant to say "a friend"

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    no async
    no generics/type parameters
    no sum types

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    No generics
    No method overloading

    t. php dev

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    function name inconsistency and function argument order inconsistency

  15. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    The only thing that sucks about PHP is that no modern company use it

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      For good reasons, I assure you.
      Same as Perl, with the notable difference that PHP has WordPress to pull it forward. If WordPress disappeared tomorrow, people would forget about PHP just as everyone forgot about Perl and Ruby.

  16. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >dude, laravel dude
    >yii man
    >we symphony here
    >this is a mature programming language, just look at the version

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >still seething that the best webdev language in #1
      moron language architects should have read the room and made what people wanted. Now we have a bastard language from rasismus leerdorf.

  17. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Too many pajeets flooding this after java is now full

  18. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I love PHP, but there's one thing that makes me want to fricking pull my brains out

    NO FRICKING THREADING
    >inb4 le pthreads/parallel extension
    REQUIRES ZTS SUPPORT
    parallel is unfinished, pthreads is outdated
    ZTS requires you to compile the shit and no one knows how, and a script on github that lets you set it up for you nukes your /usr/sbin folder

    Laravel uses an event loop, so you cant use curl functions because it blocks I/O. PSR codestyle is awful. No good websocket library, and I tried many many many many times to implement one but I keep hitting roadblocks cause of being forced to use processes.

    Currently learning C because of the threading problems...

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >Currently learning C because of the threading problems...
      why didn't you pick golang if you want a web lang with a good concurrency model

  19. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I want to suggest that everyone here try JS, it's an amazing frankenstein's monster language that can do everything, also it can run everywhere. it's fast to code in, and computers nowadays are so fast that an interpreted language is a non-issue. When you learn the language you instantly become a full-stack engineer and you'll be able to create pretty much anything you could dream of.

    It has the most optimized runtime in the world, it's only a few times slower than eg rust or c... why take on the incredibly steep learning curve to grok rust? why open yourself to "footgunning" by manual memory management?! Humans don't think like machines wheny they want to do _anything_.

    "Did I remember to free all the memory pointed to by these pointers?" - words uttered by a madman.

    Scaling horizontally solves 99.99% of "performance problems" anyways, so you can keep paying $$ instead of your precious developer time until you can afford to hire someone who specialized into RUST (so he can do the inevitable "rewrite it in rust").

    Don't waste your time... just write JS to get shit done. High level languages are where it's at, never look back. But don't use PHP.

  20. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    the fullstack from devops, testing, vendor management is all over the fricking place with its own fricking way of doing things that follows their own standards. JS ecosystem is a more leaner approach. PHP you dont have too many choices.

  21. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    php chuds should just accept that python won the scripting language race.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Gemephant

  22. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    why does it make trannies seethe so much??

  23. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >tell me what's bad about PHP 7.4+
    it's PHP
    >tell me flaws of PHP 8.2+
    it's still PHP

  24. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    People still use this trash? Seriously the worst thing to happen in computer science. Arguably perl is a better language than this shit heap.

  25. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    the pants on head moronic syntax for function passing
    https://www.php.net/manual/en/language.types.callable.php

    The first class callable shit from 8.1 is acceptable.

    For 8.2, I'd say the lack of function overloading. We got typing to an acceptable degree, but you can't (and probably won't ever) be able to call a function with different arguments and get different behavior without conditionals out the ass and ugly parameter lists

  26. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >tell me something bad about PHP
    it's web tech

  27. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    it's ugly. and annoying to set up.
    uh. yeah that's it actually.
    still will use asgi and python though, since 90% of the time i'm not generating html.

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